When my friend Lawra Gosslin-Harris wrote a letter about a woman who got her car towed, I wanted to reply from the perspective from the guy who towed the car.
Harry “the hydraulics guy” Foster
Hydraulics Plus INC
5507 E. Desmet Ave
Spokane Valley, WA 99212
giterdone783@aol.com
Mrs. Carol June Parker
November 16, 2011
RE: Parking Spot Tow.
Dear Mrs. Parker:
I’m sorry that your friend’s car was towed away by my friend, Tucker. He owns Tucker’s Towing and I’m Harry the hydraulics guy. It’s kind of our thing. First off I’d like you to know that I do work in a lofty profession - namely we work on the large hydraulics which put cars in the air. So yes we are quite literally in a “lofty” profession. Get it? Ha!
You and I will more than likely never be friends, but I still find humor helpful when two people such as us are simply not going to see eye to eye. Unfortunately even though you may get the above joke, you do not seem to get the the demand of a needy mistress known as the hydraulics industry. Your count is right Mrs. Parker, I have 6 parking spots which I pay dearly for and when people ignore the clear signage I’ve posted there are consequences.
And yes, I’m familiar with mommy cars. I have three children of my own drawing child support on a bi-weekly basis so I do not need any education on that matter, thank you. I can hear what you’re saying, “How does he think spreading out a payment between three mothers help those poor kids at all.” Well the hydraulics industry is very good to me and I do my best to take care of mine. You’ve got to pay to play, I always say. You act as though I’ve violated the sense of safety for those children, but they’ll just eat a few boogers and forget all about it. Did you even think about me? Did you Mrs. Parker? Ever since I saw that mini van parked out in our spot, I’ve begun to compulsively and obsessively check out my window to make sure others are not stealing our spots. Let me tell you, it is taking a toll on my business. My nephew Donny who is my apprentice needs constant supervision due to a industrial accident he experienced working with a boat tarp sewing machine. With the looming threat of mommies taking our spots, my head has just not been in the game and I’ve not been able to keep as keen of an eye on him as I need to.
Okay, so maybe, just maybe I went a little too far, but to understand why I take my business so seriously, I should address a comment you made in your letter about my mother. My mother, god bless her sweet soul, was extremely proud of me before passing away four months ago. You see in my twenties I was a functioning meth addict - working in shops for cash to duck child support until I lost 3 feet of my small intestine from swallowing balloons of methamphetamine before getting on an airplane to visit my mother in Indianapolis. While at the hospital, my mom offered to help me get on my feet with a loan to open my own shop and I turned my life around then and there. So yes she is proud of me. Or....at least she was. Till her dying day she thought I had come in to a string of bad luck before she loaned me the money. I told her the operation was due to a piece of hambone I swallowed while eating soup. She never new about the drugs.
Unlike Penny’s kids I didn’t have a great life with a mini van driving mother or a father in my life. She’s lucky to have such a good husband, hopefully she’s able to come home to him every night and not accidentally park three houses down to sleep with an elderly neighbor.
Well I imagine you’ll never want to use our services which will probably be a relief to my neighboring businesses since you’d more than likely park in their spots when you come to get your complimentary 20 ton bottle jack which I’d like to offer you as my apologies.
Good luck to you,
Harry “The hydraulics guy” Foster
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